Marc Gunn - The Humours of Whiskey
[Verse 1]
Let your quacks and newspapers be cuttin' their capers
And curing the vapors the scratch and the gout
With their medical potions, their pills and their lotions
Upholding their notions, they're mighty put out
Who can tell the true physics of all things pathetic
And pitch to the devil, cramp, colic, and spleen
You'll know it I think if you take a big drink
With your mouth to the brink of a jug of poteen
[Chorus]
So stick to the creature, the best thing in nature
For drowning your sorrows and raising your joys
Oh, what moderation gives hope to a nation
Can give consolation like poteen me boys
[Verse 2]
No liquid cosmetic to lovers athletic
Or ladies pathetic can give such a bloom
As the sweet by the powers in the garden of flowers
E'er gave their own bowers such a darling perfume
And this liquid so rare if you willingly share
To be taking your hair when it's frizzled and dead
Oh, the sod has the merit to yield the true spirit
So strong it will shake all the hairs from your head
[Chorus]
So stick to the creature, the best thing in nature
For drowning your sorrows and raising your joys
Oh, since it's perfection, no doctor's direction
Can cleanse the complexion like poteen me boys
[Verse 3]
As a child in me cradle, the nurse from her ladle
Was swillin' her mouth with a notion of Pep
When a drop from her bottle fell into my throttle
I capered and scrambled right out of her lap
On the floor I lay crawlin' and screaming and bawling
'Til me mother and father were called to the fore
All sobbing and sighing, they feared I was dying
They found I was only crying for more
[Chorus]
So stick to the creature, the best thing in nature
For drowning your sorrows and raising your joys
Oh, Lord, how I'd chuckle if babes in their truckle
Could only be suckled on poteen me boys
[Verse 4]
Through youthful digressions and times of depression
My childhood's impression still clung to my mind
And at school or at college, the basis of knowledge
I never could gulp 'til with whiskey combined
And as older I'm growing times e'er bestowin'
On Erin's potation, a flavor so fine
And how ere they may lecture on Jove and his nectar
Itself is the only true liquid divine
[Chorus]
So stick to the creature, the best thing in nature
For drowning your sorrows and raising your joys
Oh, Lord, 'tis the right thing for courting and fighting
There's naught so exciting as poteen me boys
[Verse 5]
Come guess me this riddle, what beats pipes and fiddle?
What's hotter than mustard and wilder than cream?
What best wets your whistle? What's clearer than crystal?
What's sweeter than honey and stronger than steam?
What will make the dumb talk? What will make the lame walk?
The elixir of life and philosopher's stone
And what helped Mr. Brunel to dig the Thames Tunnel?
Wasn't it poteen from old Inishowen?
[Chorus]
So stick to the creature, the best thing in nature
For drowning your sorrows and raising your joys
Oh, Lord, it's no wonder, if lightning and thunder
Was made from the plunder of poteen me boys
Let your quacks and newspapers be cuttin' their capers
And curing the vapors the scratch and the gout
With their medical potions, their pills and their lotions
Upholding their notions, they're mighty put out
Who can tell the true physics of all things pathetic
And pitch to the devil, cramp, colic, and spleen
You'll know it I think if you take a big drink
With your mouth to the brink of a jug of poteen
[Chorus]
So stick to the creature, the best thing in nature
For drowning your sorrows and raising your joys
Oh, what moderation gives hope to a nation
Can give consolation like poteen me boys
[Verse 2]
No liquid cosmetic to lovers athletic
Or ladies pathetic can give such a bloom
As the sweet by the powers in the garden of flowers
E'er gave their own bowers such a darling perfume
And this liquid so rare if you willingly share
To be taking your hair when it's frizzled and dead
Oh, the sod has the merit to yield the true spirit
So strong it will shake all the hairs from your head
[Chorus]
So stick to the creature, the best thing in nature
For drowning your sorrows and raising your joys
Oh, since it's perfection, no doctor's direction
Can cleanse the complexion like poteen me boys
[Verse 3]
As a child in me cradle, the nurse from her ladle
Was swillin' her mouth with a notion of Pep
When a drop from her bottle fell into my throttle
I capered and scrambled right out of her lap
On the floor I lay crawlin' and screaming and bawling
'Til me mother and father were called to the fore
All sobbing and sighing, they feared I was dying
They found I was only crying for more
[Chorus]
So stick to the creature, the best thing in nature
For drowning your sorrows and raising your joys
Oh, Lord, how I'd chuckle if babes in their truckle
Could only be suckled on poteen me boys
[Verse 4]
Through youthful digressions and times of depression
My childhood's impression still clung to my mind
And at school or at college, the basis of knowledge
I never could gulp 'til with whiskey combined
And as older I'm growing times e'er bestowin'
On Erin's potation, a flavor so fine
And how ere they may lecture on Jove and his nectar
Itself is the only true liquid divine
[Chorus]
So stick to the creature, the best thing in nature
For drowning your sorrows and raising your joys
Oh, Lord, 'tis the right thing for courting and fighting
There's naught so exciting as poteen me boys
[Verse 5]
Come guess me this riddle, what beats pipes and fiddle?
What's hotter than mustard and wilder than cream?
What best wets your whistle? What's clearer than crystal?
What's sweeter than honey and stronger than steam?
What will make the dumb talk? What will make the lame walk?
The elixir of life and philosopher's stone
And what helped Mr. Brunel to dig the Thames Tunnel?
Wasn't it poteen from old Inishowen?
[Chorus]
So stick to the creature, the best thing in nature
For drowning your sorrows and raising your joys
Oh, Lord, it's no wonder, if lightning and thunder
Was made from the plunder of poteen me boys
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